Woodworking Olympics

[DIYGUY]

In the theme of this summers Olympics I open the discussion to the creation of a new category of herculeam achievements in Woodworking. The proposed Olympics would have many different events to test skills such as lumbering, sawyering, planing, fitting, finishing and so forth. I believe there could be two categories for each event - powered and hand tooled. The events would include disciplines such as turning, with several mandatory pieces. Judgment would be on style and degree of difficulty.

Here are my first suggestions for events:

Tree felling - taking a living tree down and converting it into 8' x 12" x 6/4" planks. Different degrees of difficulty would be awarded depending on the species involved. Extra points for using an axe and a ripsaw.

Six-board blanket chest - using only six boards build a blanket chest with as much style and fit and finish as possible within two hours. No restrictions on power tools, but every minute over two hours results in a one-tenth deduction from total score.

Candlestick holder and salad bowl turning - using a standard pattern kept a closely guarded secret until game time, create a candlestick and a bowl from a blank. Points awarded for surface finish (no sandpaper permitted), accuracy of reproduction (one-tenth deduction for every .050 off) and visual appeal.

Jewelry box - take a given stack of seasoned stock and create a jewelry box that satisfies the following criteria:
- must fit into a one-gallon paint can.
- must have two fully functional drawers with extra points for dovetails
- must have a top that opens, but hinges are optional. If hinges are used they must be wood and fashioned from the provided stock.
Points awarded based on degree of difficulty and style with merit points if the SWMBO agrees to cook a steak dinner in return.

Okay North Carolina Woodworker members the field is wide open - let's hear your nominations for the Woodworking Olympics!

[JimmyC]

All I have is one event.

Norm watching - Seeing who can consume the most Eastern NC bbq and their favorite beverage from the start of one show to the end.

Jimmy

[Bigdog72]

I am really surprised that you didn't include anything for those of us who work wood in order to buy tools. How about a shop design category with extra points awarded for fitting all tools in smaller spaces? Or, for a speed event, reducing a sheet of plywood to workable parts using the provided tools? Or, reorganizing a peg board alphabetically?

OK, I'll go bak to work!

[Bas]

Originally Posted by DIYGUY

Okay North Carolina Woodworker members the field is wide open - let's hear your nominations for the Woodworking Olympics!

Completing an actual project in 2 hours? I was thinking something a little more simpler. I can't even select all the right swear words for a project in 2 hours....

Pole Fault - Turn a 2' stick on a lathe, and try to make a perfect 2"diameter cylinder. Judge measures the diameter of the stick every inch, and notes the difference (over/ under).

Waitlifting - All contestants must order a new, heavy power tool (> 350lb). Next, you must demonstrate patience by waiting 24 hours for a fellow woodworker to come help assemble the tool. If you succumb to the temptation to assemble it by yourself, you're out of the competition. The waiting period doubles each round.

Floor Exercises - The shop floor is coated with a thin layer of sawdust. Next, each contestant must move a bandsaw, table saw and jointer (each on a mobile base) from one end of the shop to the other. Fastest combined time wins.

Floor Exercise Relay - As above, but during a Shop Crawl.

Uneven bars - Timed event who can shim an outfeed table quickest to align with the table saw. 5 seconds are added for each .01" difference.

Hammer Throw - For safety reasons, orange Dead Blow hammers from Harbor Freight will be used

Synchronized Mortising - Both team members must chop a mortise 1/2" wide and 3/4" deep within 3 minutes. Points are awarded for difficulty (wood species, tools) and execution

110m hurdles - Walk from one end of Steve Coles' shop to the other, without tripping over any tools.

Fencing - Align the fence on your table saw to be parallel with the blade. Bonus points if the rear end toes away from the blade by .001 - .003,

400cm race - Using a Domino, create mortises 10cm apart. First one to complete 400cm of mortises (4m) wins.

[ScottM]

I see Bas is back in the glue!!!!

[DIYGUY]

Nah - he is in the spirit(s) of what I was seeking for events. Come on guys - there should be a lot more of you with originality of ideas ...

[Tar Heel]

Originally Posted by NC Scroller

I see Bas is back in the glue!!!!

And he is taking some BIG sniffs.

[Gotcha6]

I'll bring one back from a previous post:

1. Dumpster diving - retrieving the most valuable article from a dumpster. Two categories - regular and construction. Points deducted for curbside pickups & points added if you're in your 'Sunday Suit'.

Here's more:

2. Lumber Relay - getting lumber delivered the farthest via North Carolina Woodworker Pony Express. Bonus points for largest number of handoffs and the quickest time.

3. Shop Put - putting everything in your shop in its proper place. A timed event with points added or deducted for having the tools sharp & clean before they're stored.

4. Speed Walking - hurrying to the house in an accelerated gait so as not to cause undue alarm after you've cut yourself in the shop.

5. Archery - (not what you think) getting relief for your flat feet after standing on a concrete floor for so long.

6. Triple Jump - getting to the door over the piles of lumber & scraps before your wife throws out your supper.

7. Wrestling - pondering which power tool to buy from at least 3 options on at least 2 sales formats (i.e. WC, Ebay, CL, you get the idea).

8. Basketbawl - fussing about scraps you see in another WWer's trashcan that you can use. Bonus points if you pull it outa their woodstove - lit!

9. Snow boreding (a winter sport) - staying in the shop the longest during a period of frozen precipitation. Points added if you ain't got a heater or fridge!

10. Slalom - following the looooong drop cord around the shop from its plug to the intended tool without tripping.

11. Curling - planing a board perfectly flat then laying it on a concrete floor for a week. Points added for deflection in both axes.

[Bas]

Originally Posted by Gotcha6

Here's more:

[Glennbear]

I don't know who had me laughing harder, Bas or Dennis You guys have some minds that are wayyyyyyyyy overactive

[Gotcha6]

Just following Bas's lead. To much Mad Magazine in my youth, I guess.

[DIYGUY]

Well done lads! Now let's have the heats and may the best man win!

[Bas]

Originally Posted by Gotcha6

8. Basketbawl - fussing about scraps you see in another WWer's trashcan that you can use. Bonus points if you pull it outa their woodstove - lit!

..and the Australian Rules version, Basketbrawl - fighting with anohter NCWWer over wood scraps in someone's trash can Bonus points if you pull it outa their woodstove and set the other guy/ gal on fire.

Curiously, there have been zero entries for this event. Must be Tracy Syndrome

(Tracy Syndrome - the phenomenon that makes North Carolina Woodworker'ers nice, helpful, considerate & generous people. Sort of like Woodguy Disease)

[TracyP]

Originally Posted by Bas

..and the Australian Rules version, Basketbrawl - fighting with anohter NCWWer over wood scraps in someone's trash can Bonus points if you pull it outa their woodstove and set the other guy/ gal on fire.

Curiously, there have been zero entries for this event. Must be Tracy Syndrome.